But I found I just had to step outside of myself, stop peering into worlds I'd constructed, and photograph outside. I went back to a place I have been photographing periodically for about 12 years.
Although with every year this old cabin gets rougher and drastically more dilapidated I always feel like I'm going home to someplace comforting and warm and friendly. Maybe it's the way that the cabin is still standing only because of the way it leans into a supporting tree. Maybe because it is turning back into the natural forms it came from. Maybe it's because my husband and I lived for 7 years in a rustic one room cabin. Or maybe it's all these things, and many more. So I took this portrait of the cabin with the idea I will build a little sculpture of it.
Across the street from the cabin is an old abandoned farm house and barn.
It was all intact when I first discovered the place. But weather has taken it's toll on the barn, and the roof has started to collapse. The last heavy snow of this winter has collapsed the roof even more since I took this photograph a couple weeks ago. I feel like this place is on the verge of transforming dramatically into a new shape or heap of who knows what, so I have been dragging cameras there whenever weather and light have allowed. One breezy day while I was waiting for my paper negatives in my pinhole cameras to be exposed I listened with both fascination and fear to the groan of the steel roof sheeting as the wind tried to pry it loose. This just made me feel more desperate to capture this barn's final transformation from function into something else. A story of the past, a relic, a ruin, or what? I'm not sure what it really will be, but I'm watching it, and I'm trying to let it tell me its tales.
Most of the time I do not take photographs with all three kinds of cameras at the same shoot. But I am taking photographs of the same places with all three cameras. So now I am at a place of looking at three different visual "voices", and it's hard for me to say which speaks better for my subjects.
BARN ACROSS THE STREET
OLD HOUSE IN WATERBORO
And sometimes I just like the surprise gifts: